I just want to cry. To be able to cry to let all this tension, anxiety, disappointment and self-hate out. Tonight I burnt my wrist on the oven as I walked past it and wanted to cover it up to begin with. I then decided to wash the dishes in the most beautifully hot water which meant it hurt quite a lot for a while before I couldn't feel the pain anymore; damn.
I can't surprise anyone, I can't confide in anyone without it getting around, I can't bear the cramps this medication is giving me. What else is this medication doing? Sure it's making my dopamine levels go up, but that doesn't mean I don't feel low. I want to cry. I want my sisters here with me so I can take them shopping and surprise them with Christmas gifts. I want my best friends back here with me.
And here they come... tears: you are welcome. Thank-you!
I can't surprise anyone, I can't confide in anyone without it getting around, I can't bear the cramps this medication is giving me. What else is this medication doing? Sure it's making my dopamine levels go up, but that doesn't mean I don't feel low. I want to cry. I want my sisters here with me so I can take them shopping and surprise them with Christmas gifts. I want my best friends back here with me.
And here they come... tears: you are welcome. Thank-you!
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